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I'm pretty sure that mankind will die out very soon! Therefore I'm gonna leave a diary for somebody to find and maybe understand why we have done this to our earth. At present we live in the year 2189. The world seems to be devastated, to be exact nearly destroyed. On the whole it started with the overpopulation in Asia, especially China and spread in the course of the years in all continents. The people were forced to live together in small apartments and food uses to get scarce since those times. Moreover the unemployment rose more and more and poor people had no other way than living on the streets. For that reason diseases distributed under the lower class and couldn't be healed because of a lack of money. By the way I am Alicia, 15 years old and live in New York City. I often got told about the situation a couple of years ago, when I was little, and I always thought it couldn't get worse in the future, but now, 20 years later, I know it can. Back to the story I want to tell you something about the third world war, which started five years ago because of the shortage of food and drinking-water. The diseases, which first attacked only the poor people spread in the whole country and infected everyone, who came in contact with a sick person. Unfortunately it couldn't be produced enough medication and a lot of people and animals died on the disease or in a fight about food. This is exactly the situation where I am now. My parents died a few weeks ago because they stole some water from a sea for us and got caught. The policeman shot both of them because this is one of the worst criminal offences and water needs to be paid for a lot of money, which we didn't have. Apart from that I am living with my six-years-old brother Kevin together in a small cabin outside the city, where an old man died and left behind some cans of food and bottles of water. Incidentally there is inflation and buying a bread means to have millions of dollars, which almost nobody can afford. Additionally it is not worth it to work because nobody can earn as much as he needs and this is why the whole way of life consists of finding food and water and killing persons who have it. Furthermore the hole in the ozone layer grows from day to day and pollutes our air. Plants and animals seem to die out and trees do not have the chance to produce fresh oxygen. Everybody has as much fear as I have. Since a few days we do not have anything to eat left and my brother and I do think to leave our home for the first time in our lives to find a better place somewhere else. Besides the newscaster tells the population that our sun is going to burn out in the next years, although nobody knows how much time we have left. The temperature goes up each week a little bit and that in winter! We are sweating every night because we do not have enough money for the air-conditionar and my nerves are on edge all the time. Sometimes I do believe it would be better if the earth would not exist anymore, but probably it won't take much tim anyway. Two hours later after Alicia put her diary away, she wakes up and starts looking for her young brother, who must have left the cabin when she slept. Therefore she gets nervous and determines to search for him, but as soon as she opens the door a mass of men, women and children run into the direction of the mayor's house with many weapons in their hands. The sorrow about Kevin is so great, so that she presses herself into the mass and is on the lookout for him. At the same moment a lot of men already attack the mayor's house and try to find some bread and water in there and suddenly Alicia sight her brother hiding behind a garbage can and eating a small piece of bread. Consequently Alicia is so happy as she hasn't before since a long time, but when she walks up to him he starts running away because he doesn't think to share the bread with his sister, which shows the despair of the people. All of a sudden a lot of policemen shoot into the crowd to get them away from the mayor's house and hit Alicia, who falls to bottom. Only three minutes later she dies on the street and the story finishes here.
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Introduction
  • Is the main idea (i.e., the writer's opinion of the story title) stated clearly?
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Body Paragraph
  • Does each body paragraph have a clear topic sentence that is related to the main idea of the essay?
  • Does each body paragraph include specific information from the text(including quoted evidence from the text, if required by the instructor)that supports the topic sentence?
  • Is there a clear plan for the order of the body paragraphs (i.e., order of importance, chronology in the story, etc.)?
  • Does each body paragraph transition smoothly to the next?
Conclusion
  • Is the main idea of the essay restated in different words?
  • Are the supporting ideas summarized succinctly and clearly?
  • Is the concluding paragraph interesting? Does it leave an impression on the reader?
Overall Essay
  • Is any important material left unsaid?
  • Is any material repetitious and unnecessary?
  • Has the writer tried to incorporate "voice" in the essay so that it has his/her distinctive mark?
  • Are there changes needed in word choice, sentence length and structure, etc.?
  • Are the quotations (if required) properly cited?
  • Has the essay been proofread for spelling, punctuation, grammar, etc.?
  • Does the essay have an interesting and appropriate title?
My Utopia
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My Utopia

Words: 797    Pages: 3    Paragraphs: 9    Sentences: 35    Read Time: 02:53
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              I'm pretty sure that mankind will die out very soon!
              Therefore I'm gonna leave a diary for somebody to find and maybe understand why we have done this to our earth.
             
              At present we live in the year 2189. The world seems to be devastated, to be exact nearly destroyed. On the whole it started with the overpopulation in Asia, especially China and spread in the course of the years in all continents. The people were forced to live together in small apartments and food uses to get scarce since those times.
             
              Moreover the unemployment rose more and more and poor people had no other way than living on the streets. For that reason diseases distributed under the lower class and couldn't be healed because of a lack of money.
             
              By the way I am Alicia, 15 years old and live in New York City. I often got told about the situation a couple of years ago, when I was little, and I always thought it couldn't get worse in the future, but now, 20 years later, I know it can.
             
              Back to the story I want to tell you something about the third world war, which started five years ago because of the shortage of food and drinking-water. The diseases, which first attacked only the poor people spread in the whole country and infected everyone, who came in contact with a sick person. Unfortunately it couldn't be produced enough medication and a lot of people and animals died on the disease or in a fight about food. This is exactly the situation where I am now. My parents died a few weeks ago because they stole some water from a sea for us and got caught. The policeman shot both of them because this is one of the worst criminal offences and water needs to be paid for a lot of money, which we didn't have. Apart from that I am living with my six-years-old brother Kevin together in a small cabin outside the city, where an old man died and left behind some cans of food and bottles of water.
             
              Incidentally there is inflation and buying a bread means to have millions of dollars, which almost nobody can afford. Additionally it is not worth it to work because nobody can earn as much as he needs and this is why the whole way of life consists of finding food and water and killing persons who have it. Furthermore the hole in the ozone layer grows from day to day and pollutes our air. Plants and animals seem to die out and trees do not have the chance to produce fresh oxygen.
             
              Everybody has as much fear as I have. Since a few days we do not have anything to eat left and my brother and I do think to leave our home for the first time in our lives to find a better place somewhere else. Besides the newscaster tells the population that our sun is going to burn out in the next years, although nobody knows how much time we have left. The temperature goes up each week a little bit and that in winter! We are sweating every night because we do not have enough money for the air-conditionar and my nerves are on edge all the time. Sometimes I do believe it would be better if the earth would not exist anymore, but probably it won't take much tim anyway.
             
              Two hours later after Alicia put her diary away, she wakes up and starts looking for her young brother, who must have left the cabin when she slept. Therefore she gets nervous and determines to search for him, but as soon as she opens the door a mass of men, women and children run into the direction of the mayor's house with many weapons in their hands. The sorrow about Kevin is so great, so that she presses herself into the mass and is on the lookout for him. At the same moment a lot of men already attack the mayor's house and try to find some bread and water in there and suddenly Alicia sight her brother hiding behind a garbage can and eating a small piece of bread.
             
              Consequently Alicia is so happy as she hasn't before since a long time, but when she walks up to him he starts running away because he doesn't think to share the bread with his sister, which shows the despair of the people. All of a sudden a lot of policemen shoot into the crowd to get them away from the mayor's house and hit Alicia, who falls to bottom.
             
              Only three minutes later she dies on the street and the story finishes here.
My Dream Essay Narrative Essay 
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